moms best friend Lorraine and mom they look almost like sisters

Mom

Today is the last day of summer.  I will say that this summer was not all I had hoped it would be.  I had dreams of spending my time relaxing close to home almost carefree sadly that is not what happened.

Summer started off nice enough but at the end of June my mother became sick and entered the hospital.  This was not that unusual, mom had kidney problems and she would get admitted for a kidney infection, be treated and sent back home.  Often but not always I would pick her up and take her home and spend the first night back with her.  She seemed to get better in fact I was heading her way to take her home when she got much worse.  I got a call from the hospital saying she had a stroke and then coded.  The staff at Norfolk General got her back and again she seemed to get better.

 I went to the hospital and stayed with mom until she was well on the mend.  Things were looking good and at that time she had no neurological deficits and In fact she was so much better that I had come back to the mountains to get a day in at work and then pick up my trailer and head back to Norfolk, mom was going to go into rehab and I wanted her to have her motorized wheel chair hence I needed the trailer.  I got home on Saturday afternoon.  On Sunday morning I called my mom and she seemed fine.  She was looking forward to getting out and going to rehab.  When I tried to call her back around noon I was not able to get her so I called the nurse’s desk and was told that my mom had gone into respiratory and coronary arrest.  She had coded for a second time.

Reviving a person who codes is a very violent thing.  Compressions break ribs and bruise the heart, the brain and other vital organs are denied oxygen which leads to other problems and the meds used can often have long term effects that are hard to fully understand.  When CPR is done out of the hospital to a relativity healthy person there is a survival rate of between 15 and 30%.  In hospital the chances of a person who has been recessitated more than once of going home is less than 10%. There are a lot of factors that enter into this but the plain fact is that a person that is recessitated more that once is most likely not going home.  I am a nurse and I work in the emergency department I know this and watching my mom on the ventilator for the second time was not easy.

I called the family and had those that could come. 

Believe it or not after making the calls mom seemed to get better again. She got off the vent and again with no apparent deficits. She seemed to pick up a bit after my brother and sister and sister in law got there.  Things seemed pretty good; I was thinking mom had beaten the odds.   Her doctor a wonderful man brought me down to earth.  Her lab work was not looking all that great and he suggested palliative care. 

After talking to mom, she was totally oriented and capable of making her own decisions, we decided to stop all care that did not add to moms comfort.  Thursday we contacted home health and made arrangements to get her home.  She was going to go home on Tuesday, three weeks after starting this little adventure, and either get better of die at home.  Friday night mom was in high spirits, she was tired but alert.  Again she seemed to be doing well.  We all went to our rooms; Norfolk General has rooms for family to get a good night sleep, the first time she was by herself in over a week.  At 4am Saturday morning we got a call saying that mom had died.

Mom was born on August 30^th 1933 and she died July 14^th 2012.  She was almost 79 years old.  I will miss her.

The rest of the summer has been spent handling my moms affairs and coming to grips with her loss.  At times mom was the bane of my existence.   She kept me busy with her honey do lists, I never knew when I was done because she never told me all that was on it and the way she spent money drove me up the wall but she was the best mom she could be, she seemed to be happy and she had good friends. Every one I have spoken to has had nothing but nice things to say about my mom.  Mom will be missed.